Short jokes
Q. What's the difference between a Kevlar vest and a CEO?
A. The CEO isn't bulletproof.
There are a lot of upsides to being an orphan.
For one, you never have to worry about your jokes being family friendly.
If a CEO goes blind, are they just an EO?
What do you call a shoe made by George Floyd?
The Breath Takers.
What are the three worst years of a black child's life?
First grade!
109 countries can't be wrong. Watch Europa: The Last Battle.
If a man and a woman need a marriage license to get married, does a lesbian couple need a liquor license to get married?
Why did Severus Snape cross the road wearing an invisibility cloak?
So no one would know what side he was on.
Alabama's saying: It's not cheating if we’re all siblings.
Why do Americans always win gold at the shooting Olympics?
Because they practice at the best schools.
A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead are all in the 9th grade. Which one is the sexiest?
The blonde, because she’s the only one who’s 18.
How does Hellen Keller meet men?
She goes on blind dates.
I cannot believe Kelly Clarkson's music is considered pop! More like comatose music!
I got kicked out of the hospital.
Apparently, the sign "Stroke patients here" meant something totally different.
What’s something you can say during a pregnancy test and during a sporting event?
"We’ve got a runner!"
What do birds and planes have in common?
They both fly into building windows.
What's better than winning the Paralympics wheelchair race?
Walking.
If a pregnant emo kills herself, is that murder-suicide or just abortion?
These posts are brutal; they're leaving nothing left standing.
Why is it so hard to make friends in Antarctica?
Because you cannot break the ice.