Short jokes
Why can't an orphan be gay?
Because they have no one to call daddy.
What do you call a black person with a pride flag? A Cosmic Brownie.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Queen.
Queen who?
You don't know the queen? You're crazy!
Why did Michael Jackson love melted chocolate? Because he could pour it on his cock, then get a prepubescent boy to suck it off.
Yes, the Queen has died today. Can the people of the world please finally tell Harry to stop cross-dressing as her?
What do you call an Indian with pink hair?
Ghandi floss.
Roses are red, violets are blue, this poem doesn’t make sense, washing machine.
What did one needle say to the other?
"You be looking sharp!"
Aren't paraplegics just plegics that can fly?
I don't say funny stuff because I'm afraid they will take the German passport from me.
What do chickens play in the pool? Marco Polo.
Why don’t mountains take things seriously?
Because they’re hill areas.
What was the name of Russia's first female traffic cop?
Ivana Pulyova.
Why is Russia invading Ukraine?
«Мы хотим вернуть Советский Союз!»
Just accidentally emailed a porn link to a co-worker... So I emailed ten other co-workers the link and called it a virus.
Kid: Mom, what’s dark humor?
Mom: Do you see that man without arms over there? Tell him to clap.
Kid: But, Mom, I’m blind!
Mom: Exactly.
What’s the difference between peanut butter and a dead baby?
Dogs only lick peanut butter off private parts.
Why did Michael Jackson rush to H&M?
They had new Billie Jeans!
So I became a teacher in a school for disabled children.
A kid wanted to ask me a question, so I told him to stand while he address me. 💀
How do you blindfold an Asian? String!