Short jokes
What do chickens play in the pool? Marco Polo.
Why does it take three women with PMS to screw in a lightbulb?
IT JUST DOES!!!!
Why don’t mountains take things seriously?
Because they’re hill areas.
What’s the difference between a hoe and a rooster?
A rooster says, "Cock-a-doodle-doo," and a hoe says, "Any cock will do."
When you're sitting in class and the quiet kid yells, "Lovely day, isn't it?" ... and you see a Glock shape in his pocket.
What do you call a letter using the bathroom?
The P.
Roses are red, violets are blue, this poem doesn’t make sense, washing machine.
How do you cure a ginger?
Chemotherapy.
Why can't an orphan be gay?
Because they have no one to call daddy.
What's the difference in Japanese Kamikaze and 9/11?
There is none, they both go up in flames.
Here is a jacket for my favorite Jew.
It says, "271032."
What’s the best part about having sex with a pregnant woman?
You can have sex and a blow job at the same time.
UU looks like boobies, hehe.
You want to hear a rape joke? Yeah. Damn you ruined it.
Kobe Bryant and 9/11 are two things I don't joke about because when I do, they tend to crash and burn.
Trump, must I say more?
Most people smother babies with love.
I smother them with pillows.
Why doesn't Helen Keller's kid have ears? She gave it its first haircut!
What's worse than getting raped in a cemetery? Finding someone else's semen in your mom's corpse.
Why do Scottish men wear kilts?
Sheep can hear unzipping trousers from a distance of 100 yards.