Short jokes
Roses are red... Orphans are blue... I killed the priest so I could rape them too.
What's worse than eating 5 raw oysters out of your grandmother's vagina?
Realizing you only put in 4.
What’s a homo police dog?
A gay-9.
What happens when a black person gets in a car? The check oil light turns on.
What do women, tornadoes, and hurricanes have in common? They all get the house.
Your dad never needed a van for you.
Why was the asian late to class?
His 1 minute rice took 2 minutes to cook.
What’s Stephen Hawking’s favorite band? The Rolling Stones.
How do you know you're following a DeLorean? The white line disappears.
If life gives you melons, you're probably dyslexic.
A job is like virginity. Not everyone loses it.
Your mama so fat, when Santa saw her he said, "Ho, ho, holy s***!"
What do you say when you see a pig making bread?
He's bacon.
They say watching child porn will get me 20 years in jail. I prefer to think of it as two 10-year-olds.
I'd love it if you killed yourself, but Hitler killed himself and people still hate him...
What's black, gold, and red all over?
Tupac in Vegas.
What's the best part of being a pedophile? You will never have a wife.
What's the same between a pregnant 14 year old and her fetus? They're both saying "Oh my god, my mom's gonna kill me!"
I don't want to die alone... That is why I am working my way up to become a suicide bomber!
Your forehead's so big that Michael Jackson could moonwalk across that b*tch.