Short jokes
Who is this Gwen everyone is talking about?
Why does an orphan never learn how to drive? Because he has no dad to help him.
I got fired from the library in the first 30 minutes because I "womens rights" in the sci-fi fiction section.
I used to have a skeleton of jokes, now my supply is bone dry. Guess I wasn’t that femurous.
What do you call a lesbian dinosaur?
Licka-lotta-puss.
What did the young Taliban member say to the old Taliban member?
"Okay, Boomer."
Why did the rapper become a locksmith?
Because he always had the KEYS!
Sometimes a depressed person is antidepression.
Why can't orphans go outside?
Because their parents aren't there to watch them!
Why did the people think Stephen Hawking was disrespectful?
'Cause he didn't stand up for the national anthem.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
It's me. I can't get in because Stephen Hawking is blocking the door!
You make the juice go through my power brick.
What did the hermit crabs do on Mother's Day?
They shellabrated their mommy.
Do y'all love Jesus, God? 🙏❤️
My wife left me yesterday.
I haven't talked to the kids in a year.
My stepdad took me to work, and he told me I could climb trees.
I woke up in a hospital. Wait, did I mention that my stepdad was a lumberjack?
What's the difference between Monday and a dick?
They're not different. They're both unnecessarily long and hard.
Don't say "stay positive" to the wrong doctor.
Why does a very tall man allow dwarfs to take turns to suck his balls?
Because he is nuts about them!
Person: So, Jimmy, what do you do all day?
Jimmy Savile: Anyone who I can do.