Short jokes
A mother and son were in the backyard, and the son finished building a shed. The mother says, "You're the best husband ever."
What do you call it when Hitler abuses his wife?
Adolf Hit Her.
What's the difference between $1 million and baby teeth?
I don't have $1 million in my wallet.
How many feminists does it take to change a light bulb? That's a silly question. Feminists can't change anything.
What do sheep wear to the beach?
A baa-kini.
What is a pig crossed with a pineapple?
A porkypine!
What's a rapist's fav position?
Missionary in a dark corner.
Master has given Dobby a Glock. Dobby is Thug.
A wild Iceberg appears. Go Titanic! Titanic uses Headbutt. The attack misses. Titanic faints.
Kenny's favorite part of living in his mom's basement is sleeping with the landlady.
Why haven’t any women gone to the moon?
A: It doesn’t need to be cleaned.
Kobe ended so many games with threes. Now he ends his life with trees.
You're probably getting tired of these gravity jokes... but I keep falling for them every time.
What's a skeleton's favorite food?
Spare ribs.
I didn't like having long nails, but they're growing on me.
A man walks into a bar with a slab of concrete under his arm and says, "A beer please! and one for the road!"
Where did Janet go during the bombing? Everywhere.
What do a priest and Life have in common?
They both get harder when kids are around.
I was both shocked and amazed to hear Stephen Hawking kicked the bucket.
What’s similar between the twin towers and Kobe Bryant?
They both can crash down.