Short jokes
What was Stephen Hawking's favorite genre of music? Rock and roll.
Why take a nap on the toilet?
Because it's a restroom.
What is a cat's favorite Queen song... Don't stop meow.
Why did the orphan cry? Because he was an orphan and he watched his parents die.
Me: Yo mama so fat her alphabet starts with O.
My friend: What's that supposed to mean?
Me: O B C D.
I like my girls how I like my wine, 12 years locked in the basement.
I was excited to hear Apple might start selling its own cars until I learned they wouldn’t support Windows.
Why were the mushrooms the cool guy at the party? Because he was a fungi.
Your hairline is so big, it distracts me from your face.
Yo mama so ugly that she's the reason monsters hide under the beds.
Why can’t a gay person walk a trail? Because a gay person can’t walk on a straight line.
Life’s not a game... but if it was, some people would still be stuck on the tutorial.
What's the difference between a snowman and a snowgirl?
Snowballs.
You wanna hear a good joke, kiddos?
Gods being real. (Newsflash, all gods are manmade. THEY'RE ALL FICTION!)
My roasts aren't funny. At least this shit gets me money.
Where do you buy cows in bulk?
At the stock market.
Bitches be like, "Read the room."
What genre is that in?
What is the similarity between women and freezers?
We like to put our meat in them.
I was riding ya mom... LIKE SHE’S MARIO KART!
Ahaha, I'm laughing because my friend is so black his mama killed the clown.