Short jokes
How do you know if a Black woman is pregnant?
Stick a chicken wing up there.
What do you call a gay T-Rex?
A tyranno-sore-ass!
If a deaf kid swears in sign language, does his mom wash his hands with soap?
What do Rihanna and a DJ have in common?
They know how to get a beat down.
How do you flatten curves?
With an abortion.
What's the difference between Al Qaeda and Ms. Frizzle? One flew a plane into the Twin Towers; one flew a bus into the school.
A tiny psychic escaped from jail, and the news said there a small medium at large.
I'm sorry for all the fish puns. I feel so GILL-ty.
I love the smell of my F5 key. It's very refreshing.
Somebody told me a chemistry joke. I thought it was sodium funny, I slapped my neon that one.
My girlfriend dumped me today. Apparently, I don't stand up for her in fights. I don't care. She used to push me around all the time.
What do I call a white person with 15 black kids?
Coach.
When a clock goes forward, it's tic-tac, but when Rommel goes backwards, it's tactic!
What’s green and orange and sits at the bottom of the swimming pool?
A baby with burst armbands.
What is the most dangerous mountain? Kilimanjaro.
When you have sex with a coworker but remember it's a family business.
Last time I talked to my girlfriend, she was yelling at me to put the hammer down.
Stephen Hawking would be a bad Pokemon.
He'd always be paralyzed, and his only move would be tackle!
What is the highest number?
420.
I broke up with my deaf girlfriend because she never listened to me.