Short jokes
Others, tearfully: Stop shipping real people!!
Me, packing an old lady in a FedEx box: Nope!
Why was the bus sleeping? Because it was too tired.
Fun fact: this category of jokes is the MOST hated one by feminists.
Unless you force them the point.
Warning! Warning! Warning! Warning!
"What? Where?"
Uranus be like, "Oh look, I'm Uranus. Imagine how disgusted I feel."
I have done a ton of work. A skele-ton.
Hey, do you remember that dragon thing?
Draggin' these balls across your face.
Yo mama's so fat, she was overthrown by a small militia group, and now she's known as the Republic of Yo Mama.
What do windows have in common with my wife's legs? They're easy to open.
Son: Mom, what's dark humor?
Mom: Do you see that man without arms over there? Tell him to clap.
Son: Mom, I’m blind.
Mom: Exactly.
We were watching a 9/11 documentary in class and I said, "Man, they are really bad at Jenga!"
If gravity pulls things down at 9.8 m/s squared, why did the emo kid not come down?
What does Cinderella wear to the beach?
Glass slippers.
Why can't you make fun of a bunny's head?
Because they have a hare-line.
I'm going to bomb a little child (I'm an USA bomber).
Your hairline is so ugly, even Dora the Explorer can’t even do it.
How are my sister‘s legs and peanut butter alike?\n\nThey’re both smooth and easy to spread.
What's the best cheese in the world?
Dick cheese.
A fat homeless person begged me for food, so I said, "I can see your dinner. You had plenty!"
Why don’t babies pollinate flowers?
God chose Plan B.