Short jokes
Knock knock. Who's there? Stephen Hawking. Wheelie?
Day 70 without sex, my doctor asked me, "Are you sexually active?" I said, "Why, what you tryna do?"
What can run, be an eyesore, and practice social distancing?
Your hairline.
Why did the orphan die on the road? Because they had no one to hold their hand.
I had a conversation with a Möbius strip.
It was one-sided.
What did Eminem call himself when he lost weight?
Slim Shady.
What is worse: 10 babies stapled to 1 tree, or 1 baby stapled to ten trees?
Why did the rapper bring a basketball to the concert?
To drop some SLAM DUNKS on the mic!
"Don’t be dumb, make sure she’s numb."
- Bill Cosby
What leaves a bigger memory than a passionate kiss?
A stab wound.
Dnebdoctor?
"Knock, knock.""Who's there?""Not your dad."Random kid: "My dad went to get milk. My mom said he will be back soon."
Q: What is Trump?
A: An oversized oompa loompa.
A "monster" that has 2 heads, 2 bodies, 6 feet, why am I not afraid of the "monster"? It's my dad riding a horse.
Teacher: How much is a gram?
Tyronne: Uhmm, depends on what you need.
How do you know the baby's dead? The dog plays with it more.
9/11 was pretty great to me, it's just hilarious to watch people lose at Jenga.
What starts with F and ends with uck? Firetruck, what were you thinking?
Have you heard about the blind man who saw the accident and the dead man who heard it?
Who will hit the ground first, the girl or the apple?
I don't know, it depends if the girl is emo or not. If she is emo, the rope will catch her.