Short jokes
Person: Where do I commit suicide?
Dog: Roof.
Person: Good idea.
What were the terrorist of 9/11 thinking?
We can’t go over it, we can’t go under it, we'll have to go through it.
I like my humor like my people. Well done.
Statistics show that 1 in 3 people live next to a pedophile. However, I think that's a lie because I just live next to 2 stunning 8-year-olds.
Funny thing happened today, my dad came home from work which is weird cause he’s a suicide bomber.
What's the difference between Stephen Hawking and the computer he's hooked up to? The computer runs.
Never tell an orphan about a family matter; they wouldn't understand.
If a person shoots a person about to commit suicide, is it making it less painful, or is it murder?
How do you know that the U.S. sucks at chess?
They lost two towers.
Lol. It was just a prank, bro.
Watching the 9/11 documentaries, just watching a kill cam.
what do you call a suicide bomber that loves water? a bath bomb.
What do Pink Floyd and Princess Diana have in common?
Their last big hit was the wall.
What do Catholic priests and JCPenny's have in common?
Little boys' pants half off.
Nutted in her braces, now my kids are behind bars.
How did Burger King get Dairy Queen pregnant?
He forgot to wrap his Whopper.
Sometimes you just need to take a drive through the city to clear your head.
-JFK
Let's make a joke on how depressing Monday is to ignore how depressing everyday is.
What do you not want to do when it comes to giving an emo a job?
Showing them the ropes.
So there's an orphan in a hospital, and the doctor walks up and says, "Sorry, kid, but this is a family hospital."