Short jokes
What did one bear reply to his bad pun?
"Bear with me!"
How does the Eskimo make a house of cards?
Igloos it.
These nine kids were being bullied by these 10 guys in an alley. So, I thought I would help.
It was 9/11 all over again.
There are 4 people in a line. Three stand up and say "We are standing up for cancer," and then there's the one in the wheelchair.
Goats are so lazy these days. Computers have more RAM.
How do you make a baby float?
You take your foot off its head.
What do people often say in a cold Mexican kitchen?
Brrrrrrito!
How to get your woman to come upstairs? Say you are naked.
Dad: You're adopted.
Son: Where are my real parents?
Dad: >:D They are dead, now come to their grave and sleep there.
My girlfriend broke up with me this morning, and we just started dating yesterday.
Now she's having a breakfast.
I like the iceberg... my favorite character was the iceberg!
Why did Sally drop her ice cream cone?
Because she got hit by a bus.
Gwen pegs Xzavier.
"Herro, I cannot see my eyes."
So I was on Google, and on my computer it had Windows. When Stephen Hawking died, it shut down, the shutdown sound played, and wouldn't turn on again.
You never told me you were part orangutan. Have you considered taking a vacation to Planet of the Apes?
What is the difference between lettuce and a hamburger?
When the lettuce runs, the hamburger cries.
You know bins????
They're trash!
What's the good thing about fucking 21 year olds?
There's twenty of them!
Baby > commits start breathing.
Mom > commits abort.
Baby > commits ohshit.exe