Short jokes
Hey, did you know that Stephen Hawking predicted the end of the world?
Well, not really. He predicted the end of *his* world.
What does the donkey say to the other donkey?:
Nothing, donkeys don't talk.
Stephen Hawking drove too far away from the wall and unplugged himself.
Why did Stephen Hawking die?
Because his carer lost his charger.
kanker
Why did the Duck go to rehab?
Because he was a Quackhead.
Why did Adolf Hitler wish he had two nuts?
Because he only had one.
I used to think 11/11 was mistakenly 9/11.
What do you call a rapper who works in the bakery?
DOUGH-KNIGHT
Slay.
Uranus is a cow, You may be wondering, how?
Uranus farts methane, And cows do the same.
"Can we do 69?"
"How about we do 9/11 since we will crash together?"
Never mind if I told you, it would go straight through your head.
"Beast Boy Four"
It's still depression, by the way.
I cut my dick. It is all right now, and half the size but makes for excellent breakfast.
Should I burn heaven?
Your mama was so fat that she sunk the Titanic!
Your hairline is so far back that the United States got a front row seat!
Moment and I
What type of flower do you give an orphan?
A self-raising [flour].