Short jokes
I told my wife I needed a blood transfusion when I could not remember. She said, "Be positive too."
Bad, I am now a ghost writing this.
Q. What do ghosts do when they get hurt?
A. They call an AmBOOlance.
What's a rapper's favorite type of fruit?
RHY-MANGO!
Why did the rapper become an electrician?
Because he wanted to SHOCK the audience with his RHYMES.
What do you call Helen Keller after she killed 10 people?
Helen Killer.
Your hairline is so bad even Ariana Grande stopped singing because of it.
Say "Uranus" but take out the "ur."
Your hairline receded just like your father did years ago.
You're so fat when you walk into the mall, you *are* the mall.
Why do people consume "Laxatives"?
Answer: So that they can take a "Shit", STUPID!
Peyk 47 said that Kobe Bryant is not a legend, but he is.
I want a bigger couch.
Why? You're going to be in the kitchen most of the time anyway.
My friend lives in a caravan park. His parents named him Money because they thought it was a type of currency.
If you swallow gum, it will make your poop bouncy.
What’s the difference between a fetus and a woman?
A fetus has more rights.
What do you call a terrorist in a wheelchair?
An RC-XD.
Jamal
Why did the Twin Towers fall exactly at 9/11?
Because the terrorists thought that it would be fun to call 911 as a "prank."
Sike, I lied. I like big black men.
Why can't poor people write jokes?
Because they make no cents.