A pastor asked his child what his favorite bible verse was... He responded, "Keep watch," because he wanted a watch.
Short Jokes
How do you win a game of musical chairs? You steal the chair!
One time I killed Sam, Stan, and Gran on Roblox, and she was really mad.
You're so fat, when you say the n-word, boogers come out.
Yo mama so fat that when she went to take a crap... she couldn't even take a crap!
You have thin feet that people think you were a duck.
What do Pac-Man and Olaf have in common?
They are both gay.
What did the poo say to the ass?
"I left you."
Your mom is FAAAAAAAAAT as FUCK.
All hail President Trump!
What do you call useless skin on a penis?
A man.
I don’t have another talking stage in me. 🤦🏿♂️ Do you squirt, and is your BD dead? 😭
This midget in my school has two moms. I said, "Did your dad go get the milk?" He told me to shut up. I said, "I don’t shut up, I grow up like you should."
So the Devil decided to go to McDonald's and grab some lunch. What does he get?
A hot and spicy McChicken and three six-piece nuggets.
Why is everyone trying to make a big deal out of this? My family were only flying to Pakistan and crashed into 2 towers.
Person 1: Omg, my blind boyfriend cheated on me.
Person 2: What did you expect? Him to see other hoes...
What's funny about sex? I don't get it.
A funny joke is not funny after laughing because then it becomes a porn hub.
Why couldn't the whistleblower leave his house?
He was snowed in.
They laughed at my crayon drawing.
I laughed at their chalk outline.