Short jokes
Do you know what it takes to beat cancer?
Heartbeat.
"Me so cutie right?"
Why did the orphan die on the road? Because they had no one to hold their hand.
Why don't orphans like pizza? Because they don't have parents, that's why.
What is Osama bin Laden and his al-Qaeda organization's favorite song?
It's raining planes! Hallelujah!
Lucky they're only balls, not real balls!
Why did the smart orphan lose the tech competition?
The motherboard was nowhere to be found.
A woman once falsely accused me of rape, and I was sentenced to life in prison.
PLEASE CONSIDER LAUGHING now 😂
Yo, Dad is so skinny, he doesn't work out enough.
What's the best thing about taking a shower with a 12 year old Philippino girl?
If you slick her hair back, she looks 10.
Doctor, can I please have a new butt? My old one has a hole and a crack in it.
My wife found a rock and asked if it was expensive, and I said it "leavarite". She said, "Is that expensive?" and I told her, "Leave it right there."
Why did the bean play Fortnite?
Because it had a beantroller.
Why did the Mexican chicken cross the road?
Because the mom said, "Vente, Baca."
Submit a joke :-)
Your love life.
My wife said I acted like a flamingo, so I had to put my foot down.
Today at the bank, an old lady asked me to help check her balance. So I pushed her over.
A Chinese drug dealer said to me, "Do you like my cocaine?"
I replied, "Not since he starred in Zulu."
You see, my son is very into astronomy.
Son: How do stars die?
Dad: Usually overdose, son.
I'm such an asshole to my son, my wife divorced me.
Robber 1: *gets shot in ass*
Robber 2: You have to shit in a bag for life lol.
Robber 1: What, the Tesco or Asda one?