Short jokes
Q. What do you say when your friend has an abortion?
A. May your baby rest in pieces.
"When God sends me to hell... I want him to hesitate." -Techno
"Just ditched a woman. Feelin' good!" -Techno
Which is more disabling, is it autism or Down syndrome?
Why did the parachute break up with the skydiver?
Because it was tired of being taken for granted every time things fell apart.
Why did the parachute refuse to open?
Because it had a "fatal attraction" to the ground.
Down syndrome sucks!
Why did the ass start a gardening service?
It was great at dropping SEEDS.
Why do asscheeks make great friends?
They always stick together!
Why did the ass go to therapy?
It couldn't deal with all the crap.
Why do crabs never give to charity? Because they’re shellfish.
Hahahahahahahaha what a knee slapper!
Thank you, anonymous user, for helping me with math a few months ago.
Now I got a 31 on the ACT.
What do you call an orphan with a gun?
(No) home shooter.
Shower thought: If everyone had schizophrenia, no one would know we had schizophrenia or know what it is!
Q. Why couldn't Terri Schiavo give good blow jobs?
A. She didn't know how to swallow.
Q. What's an emo's favorite type of comedy?
A. Gallows humor.
Q' What's an Alzheimer's victim's favorite type of comedy?
A. I forget.
Trump got a new jet.
He's probably already licked the windows.
I'd tell a child abuse joke, but I forget the punchline.
What is another word for Arab man who is a Palestinian Muslim?
Palestinian masseur.