You hear that? That’s the sound of me not caring.
Short Jokes
Why did the pig decline to go to the farmer's house?
He would take him to a "pignic."
I have a lot of money, but I don't waste it.
So people call me poor until they see my bank account.
Tell who we are.
Dews?
Ppppppp.
Your hairline is so far, too far, even dark humored jokes are scared of it.
It's raining men! Hallelujah!
When an African has a twin, your me??
What is the difference between an emo kid and a jug of milk?
The milk doesn't hang itself after it gets dumped.
There's nothing stronger than love, except for an M32 Rotary Grenade Launcher because fuck you and everyone near you.
Why are orphans so bad at baseball?
Because they don’t know where home is.
Person: So, Jimmy, what do you do all day?
Jimmy Savile: Anyone who I can do.
What's the similarity between your money and your life?
It just keeps going down.
You're in Australia. Your forehead is the reason why Africa is so hot.
Yesterday, I was on a reality TV show where they locked me up with all those smelly monkeys from the Leger Zoo. It was complete madness.
One time, I was making a caramel apple.
When I mistook 1 gallon of caramel for 1 camel!
Your hairline goes so far back, your mom is scared you're not going to make friends.
Finally my father came early from office today. I am very happy.
He was fired from his job.
Should I slap Flynn's ass?