Short jokes
I told my doctor I was experiencing some back pain. He told me to smoke some weed because I had chronic back pain.
Girl: You are gay.
Boy: Who says I’m gay?
Girl: You ARE GAY!
Boy: You are lesbian.
Crowd: OhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhbhbhhhbhH
A Mexican opens a pharmacy in CA. What’s he selling?
Drugs.
Why is Sean's fashion so poor? He's retarded!
What's better than throwing up a stillborn?
Making your wife eat it again.
Okay, the joke's over. Bring back Trump!
When your girlfriend tells you she's a guy: "What, bitch? Naw, hell no!"
I thought of telling my teachers that I am transgender so I get to wear my AirPods in class.
What do you call a person with one arm, one leg, one eye, and one ear?
ONESY.
“Hey dad, how do you kill a star?” - Give them drugs.
Jack and Jill went up the hill, both had Bacardi rum. When Jill's was gone, she wanted Jack's, that's why she took it from him.
What do u call a girl that runs faster than her brothers?
A redneck virgin!
"9/11 was just a really intense game of Jenga."
Face-Timing My Girlfriend:
"Hey girl! Are you a veterinarian? Because these puppies are sick!" *shows muscle*
Why did Princess Diana cross the road? She wasn't wearing a seat belt.
You're dead inside.
(Stabs him 23 times)
Men, get into the kitchen and make me a sandwich!
Women, go chop some lumber!
White people, get back into the cotton fields!
When you accidentally choke your girlfriend to death and then realize that it's your sister so who gives a f**k?
You have more chins than a Hong Kong telephone book!
If you go to the military and you get sent to a country, how many heads will you blow off?
That number is how many dicks you suck.
Cuddle with you.🙂