Short jokes

Short jokes

Man

What does a middle aged man live in?

A retarded kid he keeps in the van.

Hamster

Hey Explain bear, how would you like to be replaced by #ExplainNibbles the hamster AI?

Barbie

I don’t like to play games, actually. There is one game: It’s Barbie. Of course, I’ll be Ken, and you’ll be the box cum in.

September

Me: September is here!

[Labor Day comes]

Also me (ft. Green Day): “Wake me up when September ends!”

Life Support

POV: Your grandma is on life support. I would unplug her life support to charge my third phone.

Sex

The woman was thinking she wanted to have sex, but one second later, she did it on the street with a criminal.

Rapper

Why did the rapper bring a vacuum to the concert?

So the haters could SUCK on him!

Orphan

Why do orphans like playing tennis so much?

Because it’s the only way they’ll ever get love.

Snack

What's a prostitute's favorite snack?

Skittles. They love to taste the rainbow.

Twin Towers

Twin Towers

WOW! I CAN SEE THE TWIN TOWERS FROM HERE.

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  • Trump

    I don't laugh at Trump.

    I was taught to NEVER make fun of the mentally handicapped.

    President

    I used to think all Americans were racist.

    Now I've changed my mind. They DID elect an orange president.

    Soda

    What’s a rapper’s favorite kind of SODA?

    Dr. Dre Pepper.

    Ginger

    What does a ginger do when they want to high five a friend? They clap.