Short jokes
What does Trump stand for?
Trump Runs Underneath My Penis.
Yo mama so stupid.
When she was in mandarin class, she asked, "Where are the mandarins? I'm hungry."
You look as fat as a pig.
Dani: Hey, do you like rapists?
Tess: No!
Dani: Oh, well I'm a rapist!
Tess: Oh!
Why can Jesus walk on water?
Because rubbish floats.
Suicide
Yo mama so fat, COW!
What do squirrels eat?
Nuts. 🥜
I'm hertophobic.
It means I'm allergic to straights.
My dad always used to beat me, but he never beat cancer.
Why don’t you have a pet cheetah?
There cheetah you.
What is a big animal 🦓? A bat 🦇!
I lent my sister my bed. The next morning, she told me it worked like a dream.
What do you call an Asian that steals cars? Tommy toke a motor.
What does Adam look like?
The fat ginger baby of Boss Baby.
If Stephen Hawking had a FIFA card, he would have 99 dribbling.
Someone was walking down the street and they saw some neat...
"Diarrhea cha cha cha, Diarrheal cha cha cha!"
He might have been a Fortnite player. Respect him.
Funny thing is, dead women can't say no...
The difference between women and beer is that beer makes you happy for nothing, why women make you angry for nothing.