Short jokes

Short jokes

Abortion

What’s red, nine inches long, and makes my girlfriend cry every time she sees it?

Her abortion.

Curry

At what speed is the curry going at?

In a hurry to the curry, man!

Sex

Three people having sex is a threesome; two people is a twosome. So next time someone calls you "handsome," don't take it as a compliment.

Man

Two mums hook up!

Their daughter comes in the room and says, "Which one's the baby daddy?"

The "mum" points to the woman who was actually a man!

Steak

Someone asked me, "How would you like your steak cooked?"

I said, "On a stove!"

Wheelchair

Q. Why can't Stephen Hawking go to Heaven?

A. He can't get his wheelchair up the stairs.