Short jokes
Why did Ama cross the road?
To find his dad.
Stephen Hawking: like a cross between Nikola Tesla and... a Tesla.
A man said his bars are lit. I said no, because mine are fire.
Q: My scale had my phone number on it. Wandering why, I looked up only to see an elephant in my face...
12345678910 w =0 w
I asked my teacher if I needed to be in the special ED class, but she said I don’t eat enough vegetables.
Doin (DYM 4)
What’s comes after 9 Millimeter?
Why can't we see a camel?
Because it's camelflauged!
My ex misses me, but her aim is getting better.
What do you get when you cross a turkey and a centipede?
Drumsticks for everyone!
When I give you the signal, I want you to roll down your window and call the oncoming cyclist a prick.
What's the difference between hungry and horny? Where you stick the cucumber.
"Knock, knock." "Who's there?" "Akeld." "Akeld who?" "Assfeild!"
Everyone, just as a warning, stay AWAY from Akeld!
"You think THAT'S bad?!? Remember the time I was in Paris with Donny de Francovich?"
Why did the robot eat a lightbulb?
'Cause he was in need of a light snack!
Yurrrrrrr?
Why was the belt arrested? Because it held up pants.
So fat you're a scale said, "Fat ass."