Short jokes

Your hairline couldn't be seen even if it was glowing.

When my friend fell, I didn't crack up, but the sidewalk did.

Why couldn't the blonde dial 911?

She couldn't find the 11.

I knew you played football because your hairline is receding.

My mum is a vegan. She brings us to after school seitan.

If you measured your hairline with a protractor, it would show 90 degrees.

Had to go to the barbers just to get your hairline sorted.

If your hairline was a river, it would meander left, right, and backwards.

Caution: Looking at your hairline can cause you to be delirious and have hallucinations.

Ever tried looking in a mirror lately? I wouldn't, your crooked hairline might break it.

CIA: Where's your head at?

JFK: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

We were going to McDonald's, but we ran into your hairline!

What’s the difference between a photocopier and the flu?

One makes facsimiles; the other makes sick families.

Why does Mao Zedong like the east coast?

Because there is a red Sun in the sky.

I wish you were a soap, because I want you all over me.

I told my emo girlfriend, "Do you like the lights?" Oh wait, she ain't got any.

Your mom is so fat, she looks like she ate the marshmallow from Ghostbusters.

"Yo mama so fat when she got buried it took them all the trees on Earth for her coffin."

Confucius say: "Gay man who take far, far away trip, hates to leave friends behind."

What did Jupiter say to Uranus? Hey, I can see your Uranus from here!