Short jokes
Q: What did Darth Vader say to his smashed wristwatch?
A: I find your lack of face disturbing.
Me: No one likes Shrek; he is just a fat green guy.
Friend: Hey! Stop talking about me.
He huffed and he puffed, but instead of blowing the house, he choked it down with his mom.
Shaenaya hates me, help! And she wants to suck off ******* and ****** and ***** and *****.
What season is it when you're on a trampoline?
Spring time!
Hello.
What turns green to red in a flick of a switch?
A frog in a blender.
Did you sit in sugar?
Because you've got a sweet ass.
Are you Google?
Because you got all I am searching for.
Stan JoJo Siwa.
Time is like a machine, it slows down when beaten.
What did the water say to the water? "Water" you doing?
What do you call a goldfish that got third place? A bronze fish.
Q: What’s the difference between a sleeping lady and an onion?
A: One doesn’t scream when you try to chop it up.
Dodo.
What's Bin Laden's favorite flavor of crisp? Plain.
Someone booted Stephen Hawking offline. Maybe next time he will stand for the pledge/anthem.
Q: What is the difference between a drunk and a stoner at a stop sign?
A: The drunk guy runs it, and the stoner waits for it to turn green!
Heil Kyle!
What do you call a router in a thong?
CISCO....(that thong thong thong thong!)