Short jokes
Knock knock. Who's there? Stephen Hawking. Wheelie?
Why do emos cut their arms? Because they can't cut the rope.
Why did the grandpa leave the house to go to the grocery store?
To get the ice cream for the grandma.
Orphan: I love abcdefu!
Caretaker: Why? You don't have anyone to flip off.
What's the difference between emos and 9/11?
The emos are still there, high up off the ground.
A hobo couple is making out under a bridge.
The girlfriend goes: - Johnny, why is your dick so soft? - Flip me over, I’m trying to shit!
When I saw Stephen Hawking for the first time, I knew he had been in a shop!!! I lieeeeeeeeed! 🤣🤣🤣
You're adopted, do you want to know why? Because you're so ugly.
I thought opening a door for a lady was good manners, but she just screamed and flew out of the plane.
I just came across my wife’s Tinder profile and I’m so angry about her lies.
She is not “fun to be around.”
My boyfriend dumped me. Guess who came back crawling for his zimmer frame?
I'll kill a bitch like the policeman did to that white woman. He chopped her up and put her in the woods, the suck fuck.
Brazil is a joke.
Are you feeling down? Because I wanna feel you up.
Stephen landed at Tilted and got 199 pumped, he's 1 shot!
What’s black, white, and red all over?
An embarrassed biracial guy.
What’s the difference between an apple and an orphan?
Apples get picked.
"Go frick a cow!"
"I already fricked your mother."
I thought of you today. It reminded me to take out the trash.
"Go back to Party City, where you belong!" — Phi Phi O’Hara, RuPaul’s Drag Race.