Short jokes
Why are the English so good at chess? Because their Queen never dies.
How to Make an Orphan cry
Step 1: Talk about Home.
Step 2: Ask them where their parents are.
Step 3: Say, "Bye Bye," and push them in the Batmobile!
Some boy says 100000 digits of pi, and this other dude can't even remember the 1st one.
My girlfriend's name is Candice.
Can these nuts fit in your mouth? :D
Wanna see a joke? Open the front-facing camera.
Why shouldn’t you do drugs? Weedle make you high.
How can Pikachu make a baby laugh? By playing pika-boo!
What disease do you get from eating fish?
Salmonella!
What should people do with their floppy dicks?
I give them a good wiggle waggle to raise awareness of something!
What do you call a pile of kittens? A meowntain.
Yo momma's so old that even scientists get baffled about where she lived before Earth was created.
Which is redder: a baby or a red car? It depends on how the baby was killed!
What can a physically handicapped ♿ gay man 👬 do on his own very well 👏 without being taught how to do?
Perform fellatio on gay men.
Your mama is so fat, she broke the stairs to Heaven.
I couldn't think of anything because you're in the "countryside."
You went the wrong way. Always choose the right path.
The time I saw you and you asked me to be your friend.
Me: "Yeah... no. You're too ugly. Even your parents never loved you."
Kid: 😭
Me: What did my sister do when she dressed up as Elsa and I gave her a balloon?
You: What?
Me: She let it go, let it go!
An orphan walked up to the lemonade stand and he said to the man running the stand, "Hey, bum, bum, bum, got a family?"
Say _______ is so flat that when someone hit them, they got a paper cut!
Why was 6 afraid of 7?
'Cause 7 8 9.
But why did 7 eat 9?
'Cause you need 3 square meals a day :D