Short jokes
Why doesn't bread like warm weather?
It gets toasty!
Japanese people are so cool and organized, they have their own ways of suicide.
I have a problem. My dad and my girlfriend have the same birthday. So, one took my virginity, and the other is my girlfriend.
I've decided to marry a pencil. I can't wait to introduce my parents to my bride 2B.
My three favorite things are eating my family, and not using commas.
Watching the 9/11 documentaries, just watching a kill cam.
Why did Uranus say gross? Because he saw Uranus.
Everyone at the Queen's funeral:
Me and the boys getting her reboot card.
Are you Pikachu? Cause I want to take a "pik" at you.
Two Arabs are swapping jokes. One cracks up and yells, "Man, that joke was an absolute blast!"
What is an old lady's favorite exercise?
Trying to get up from the soft couch.
My uncle died in 9/11. He was a pilot.
We are coming out with a Whopper that is similar to a priest because it also has its meat between 5-year-old buns.
I hate when my father doesn't cook me cocktails for tea.
Your hairline is so far back that the United States got a front row seat!
What do you call a bored robot?
A “sigh”-borg.
I found your parent!
Yo momma's so fat that she plays pool with planets.
If I die, delete my search history.
What do you call a Scottish Muslim with drug problems?
(Said in a Scottish accent) "Amaffmaheed."