Short jokes
Do you know that foundation called "Autism Speaks"?
No, it screeches.
Bully: Shut up.
Me: I don't shut up, I grow up, and when I look at you, I throw up.
What's the definition of suspicious?...
A nun doing sit-ups in a cucumber field. 💀
A duck walks into a bar and buys everyone a round. He tells the bartender, “Put it on my bill.”
Somebody give me a peanut. I just ate an EpiPen.
Why did the knights laugh when they run?
The grass tickled their balls. 😅😂🤣
When the school shooter starts doing Fortnite dances and the autistic kid joins in.
I wish I had emo nails,
So they could cut themselves.
What is the difference between an orphan and a homeless person? Nothing, haha.
Someone was bullying Stephen, so I said, "Why do you not stand up for yourself?"
I asked Stephen if he was an organ donor, and he said why.
I said, "That's a shame. I need parts for my go-cart."
What's an orphan's least favorite theme song? The Barney theme song.
How do NASA plan parades?
They plan-et.
My sister told me words don't hurt her, so I chucked a dictionary at her.
Why shouldn't you say "I hate you" to your parents?
Ask an orphan.
A handicapped person and an orphan get into a fight. The orphan says, "At least I have two functional legs." The handicapped person says, "At least I have two functional parents."
My mom told me we were flying to a building to see my aunt. I wondered, "Are we about to relive 9/11?"
What did the Brit say to the American?
Well here comes fascism.
Why can't orphans play poker?
Because they don't know what a full house is.
Roses are red,
my life is a disaster,
the children are fast,
but the combine is F A S T E R!