Who comes once a year and makes your kids cry?
Rapey Santa.
Short Jokes
What's the difference between an orphan and Daniel Larusso?
At least Daniel has a mom.
I'm not transphobic. I just want transparency...
What has two wheels and goes really fast?
A vegetable down a hill.
How do I make my dick disappear?
I put it in your dad.
I was about to joke about your life, but I think your life is already a joke.
If your parachute doesn't work, don't worry.
You have the rest of your life to figure it out.
Daddy, good morning, please, I want too, but Davido's second-hand towel is 2.5 million.
Yo momma's so old that even scientists get baffled about where she lived before Earth was created.
What do you call an orphan at a construction site?
Child labor.
I couldn't think of anything because you're in the "countryside."
An orphan walked up to the lemonade stand and he said to the man running the stand, "Hey, bum, bum, bum, got a family?"
Say _______ is so flat that when someone hit them, they got a paper cut!
Why was 6 afraid of 7?
'Cause 7 8 9.
But why did 7 eat 9?
'Cause you need 3 square meals a day :D
What did the fat guy say to the skinny guy?
Fat guy: Does this look fat on me?
Skinny guy: No, I don’t think it’s that.
Fat guy: Thinking.
What's an emo kid's favorite movie?
Suicide Squad.
Have you heard about the Pillsbury Dough Boy? He died of a yeast infection.
I got jealous when my phone died.
Never let an orphan watch Fast and the Furious.
All they will talk about is how great their family is.
What do you call sex with a hoover?
Clean sex.
