Short jokes
Roses are red, Kevin Spacey is gay,
If you'd stayed with your parents, I wouldn't have taken you away.
How do you leave an idiot in suspense? I'll tell you tomorrow!
Knock knock!
Who’s there?
Dad!
Dad who?
Silence.
What do you call a restaurant that sells food that contains weed?
McBongald's.
Knock, knock.
"Who's there?"
"Ash."
"Ash who?"
"Bless you!"
Person 1: Hey, did you hear about the circus fire?
Person 2: No.
Person 1: It was in-tents.
What did one hurricane say to the other?
"I got my EYE on you!"
You want a pizza from me!!!!
You know the difference between happy tailgaters and angry tailgaters?
Happy tailgaters know how to throw a party.
Myles Parfitt ;/
What do you call a moose that doesn't want to be known? Anonymoose.
What do you call a dog magician?
Labracadabrador!
What's a pig's favorite ballet?
Swine Lake.
What did the skeleton say to Shrek?
"Jump on me. I can have two layers of skin too."
Life is beautiful, but you are ugly.
What did the skeleton say when the other skeleton lied to him?
"You can't lie to me! I can see right through you!"
Your mama is so ugly, she makes the devil cry.
What is the smallest room in the world?
A mushroom.
I did not want to join sailing, but my friend roped me into it.
What did the cannibal do after he dumped his girlfriend?
Wiped his ass.