Manchester jokes

We gave Erik ten Hag 7-Up after Liverpool thrashed Man Utd 7-0. He said, "F**k you all!"

What is a Manchester United fan’s favourite TV channel? The History Channel.

Last week, I was on a plane to Manchester when suddenly the plane was hit by a ball. I wondered where it came from, but I soon realized it was none other than Penaldo practicing his free kicks. Shame on you, Penaldo, for almost killing me!

I was walking down the streets of Manchester when suddenly I saw Penaldo getting arrested! I heard the officer say, “This time I give you warning, there will be no penalty.”

That’s when Penaldo asked, “No penalty?!” and punched the police officer.

Shame on you Penaldo!

Manchester City is gay.

If a person in a wheelchair runs you over, can you call it a "hit and can't run"?

If you get pinched by a man in a wheelchair, can you call it a "hit and can't run?"

What's the similarities between Spiderman and a homeless person?

They both have no way home!