Short jokes
In 1492 Christopher Columbus sailed the ocean blue.
He sat on a rock, tickled his cock, until it turned red, white, and blue!
What’s the difference between apples and orphans? Apples actually get picked.
What's the difference between an orphan and a corpse?
One of them has someone to mourn them.
Two magicians were in a competition. The first one did magic, and the second started counting down, "3, 2," but before he said the last number, he 1.
What did the orphan want for Christmas?
Parents.
When we told Twin Towers to put on airplane mode, we didn't mean a real airplane.
Remember 2000? It was scary.
What's the most emo name?
Carter.
I love you all the way to Uranus! 🤣
Bob: What is the percent of people who are depressed?
Me: If you're only counting me, 100%.
I saw that my brother has brain cancer, so I asked him: "Are you big brain?"
I hope you have to squeeze the hell out of toothpaste only for the little bit to fall down the sink drain.
What does an orphan and a lost kid have in common?
They have no way home.
Why do orphans hate Fridays?
Family movie night.
I wish Stephen Hawking was an organ donor. I need some parts for my laptop.
To the guy in a wheelchair who stole my camouflage coat: you can hide, but you can't run.
"Fuck me right in the balls, you dirty cow!"
If WW3 starts, I do, in fact, belong in the kitchen.
Huggy Wuggy and Kissy Missy had a baby.
They never gave him a name, so they just played cut the rope with him...
"Spider-Man: No Way Home," know why he’s an orphan now?