Short jokes
If a person kills their counselor, does that mean that they don't need therapy anymore?
What is everyone’s favorite class?
None, because people don’t like school.
Replace the v in Venus with a p.
You're hairline is like I was so fat Dora the Explorer couldn't find your numbers!
What has 4 limbs and can make a sidewalk red? Me falling from a 20 story building.
Everyone stop making 9/11 jokes; they just don't fly.
Why can't an orphan get a tattoo at a young age?
They don't have parent permission.
Your mama so fat she’s on both sides of the family.
Why do Fortnite players have such good teeth?
Because they like to floss.
Why do Jedis stay single?
Because they use "divorce" (the Force).
May divorce be with you!
Why did the emo get put at the back of the line? He cut himself.
"What's the capital of Texas?" said the brown hair.
"T," said the blonde.
What do you get if a disabled person falls off a building? Mashed potatoes.
Never challenge death to a pillow fight.
Unless you're prepared for the reapercushions.
I intern at an orphanage that burned down this weekend with 30 kids inside.
Thankfully, I don’t have to call and tell their parents.
What's the difference between a Chinese person and an old person?
One lasts long and another doesn't.
Why don’t orphans play baseball?
They don’t know where home is.
Your chin is where I went on ski vacation.
The easiest time to add insult to injury is when you're signing someone's cast.
I bet emo girls get jealous when people cut paper.