Short jokes
Why was Helen Keller's leg yellow?
Her dog was blind, too.
What is the similarity between an anti-joke and a clown? Neither are funny.
What kind of file do you need to turn a 15 mm hole into a 40 mm hole? A pedophile.
You're so short, when it rains you're the last one to know.
Adam and Eve had 3 male children, the only children on Earth. How did they reproduce?
What do you call Indian dhal that is delicious?
Well, that is DHALicious!
"You need to cease, all those fat cuz u obese."
Kid 1: I like you! Do you like me?
Kid 2: No. You never asked if I love you!
Kid 1: Aw, do you love me?
Kid 2: No!
Son: What's for dinner tonight?
Mom: Steak!
Son: Mom, you know I only eat veggies, so what's for me?
Mom: HUNGER!
These Afghanistan people suck at Jenga.
So can we agree that Jesus was the first victim of cancel culture?
Harry Potter is a movie about a grown adult man with an unhealthy obsession with a teenage boy.
If I had to rate the attack on the Twin Towers from the Muslims, I'd give it a 9/11.
I went to a book store yesterday and I saw a book that said "how to solve 50% of your problems." So I bought 2.
Mom: Please eat, baby!
Baby: No!
Mom: Here comes the airplane!
Your mum is so overdue on eBay for £2 so she could get a male stripper.
Your mum is so fat, when she reached for the remote, when she found it, it was crushed.
Someone asked me to go to hell, so I drove to my local middle school.
I have no dad, no milk, and no mom, so that means no tits, like if you can relate.
You're so ugly, even a Snapchat filter can't fix it.