Short jokes
What is a necrophile's least favorite game?
The Walking Dead.
According to a recent poll, your mother said, "I like the guy who saw the guy who doesn't have a brain!"
What do you call a Gary Dinosaur?
A mega-sore-ass.
What's the difference between Lana Del Rey and Milli Vanilli?
Milli Vanilli won a Grammy.
Your friend is so fat, when he took the group pic, he was the background.
Me: What's the fifth month of the year?
Friend: May.
Me: May deez nuts fit in your mouth?
Me: How do cowboys say hello?
Friend: Howdy.
Me: How do deez nuts fit in your mouth?
Some of you need to go to church. I don't want you in hell with me.
Am I a guard or a guava?
What do you call it if you find an old organ keyboard on the side of the road?
Organ harvesting.
Hi.
Hi hi hug hi huh hi hi.
"Is your refiger running?"
"Is your refrigerator running? You better go catch it!"
What do you get if you cross hot wheels, hot legs? Hehe.
When you get injured 😢
When you get injured in America 😭😭😭😭💵💵💵💵💵🏩🏩🏩
Why was an oven so smart?
It had 70 degrees.
Went to the doctor, told him I've been having dreams, first about a wigwam, then about a teepee. He said I was too tense.
Why don't Mexicans like winter? They're afraid of ice.
When you ask an orphan to come over:
Kid: "Do you want to come over to my house?"
Orphan: "Yeah, sure."
Kid: "Ok, ask your parents—oh wait."
The secrets of life.
Mac & Cheese.
I jump and jump if you put bread in me too many times. What am I? A toaster.