Short jokes
You: OMG I CAN'T BELIEVE ALL THE KRAP THEY HAVE BEEN THROUGH!
The other person: Who?
You aka answer: Your Butt cheeks.
What's an orphan's least favorite day? Take your kid to work day.
Orange: Hey.
Pear: Hey.
Orange: No hay!
How do you get a blonde to drown? You tell them the bottom of the pool smells weird.
Why can’t you trust an emo kid?
'Cause they always leave you hanging.
What hairstyle do horses like best while reading a story?
Pony-tails.
What famous book writer for kids loved insects?
Beatrix Potter.
I'd tell you a joke about my boyfriend's dick, but it's a private joke.
How do you spot a cow?
With a bingo dabber.
Why couldn't the twins never do anything right?
Because they were triplets!
You’re so short you would need a lift to kiss your bride.
1, 2, 3, 4, 5. I'm old enough to drive, for now I'm still alive, till I crash in that beehive!
KK or Liv?
What fruit is square and green? A lemon in disguise.
My friend nearly drowned in her bowl of muesli the other day. She was pulled in by a strong "currant."
The West is dying...just like the romance of an empire, especially the western part of the empire. Funny that, 'cause the East was going strong.
What do you call a giraffe giving a blow job to another giraffe?
Getting neck!
Women be like chivalry is dead, then don't say thank you when you open the door for them.
Me: I need a good roast.
My friend: Take me!
Aw hell naw,
dey turned Spongilebile in2 a frigin generator.