Short jokes
Roses are red, give me some limes, boy dies after masturbating 42 times.
Why is the penis so light?
Because even thots can lift them.
If sex is a pain in the ass, then you're doing it wrong.
Time heals all wounds.
Unless you have AIDS, when time kills you slowly and painfully.
Butthole.
What do you call a lesbian dinosaur?
Lick-alot-a-puss.
How come lepers don't play cards?
Well, if they lose a couple of hands...
What's the difference between a homeless person and a car?
Only one gets fuel.
Stephen Hawking died because he was too far away from the Wi-Fi router.
There are two cows in a field. One says to the other, "I'm cold. Are you cold?"
The other cow says, "Yeah, I'm Fresian."
What do you call a country with nukes?
Abomination.
We spend the weekend getting the poop out!
Evan, yo mum rode on my big PP love, dad.
"Knock, knock."
"Who's there?"
"Bone."
"Bone who?"
"It's nice to meet cha'. Can we be friends? I'm bone-ly here."
If my boobies are fish, then am I salmon boobies? Please give generously.
What did the blind man say on Christmas?
"I can feel your presents!"
What's a chair's favorite snack?
Chair-ies or Cherries if that's how you wanna spell it .3.
If the red house is on the left, and the blue house on the right, where is the white house?
In Washington D.C.
Guy feels something on his back.
“Oh God, please let that be a rifle.”
“Nope. I’m just real happy to see you.”
I was gonna clean my room
before I got high.