Short jokes
Why was the baby ant confused?
Because its uncles were all aunts!
What animal lies? A lion.
What does the Fox say?
Fraka - kaka - kaka - kow.
What did the cholo say when the house fell on him?
"Get off me, homes!"
If you want any pictures of cheese for your laptop, I've got enough to Philadelphia.
What did the sushi say to the bee?
"Wasuuubi!"
What happened when the dog played golf?
He hit the ball into the ruff.
Yesterday I asked my friend, "What is a fish without eyes?"
They replied, "I don’t know."
I said, "Fsh."
What did the man's dick say to the man?
I just can't "hand"le it!
Once there was a boat. Its friends said,
"It's time to come back." And the boat said,
"No way. I don't give into pier pressure."
Q: Why do I like bone jokes so much?
A: Because they are humerus.
What goes up must come down, apart from Mr. Vyse.
Stephen Hawking isn't actually dead. He is just having an update.
I am up in the air about becoming a pilot.
Guy is at athletic meet. Asks guy if he is a pole vaulter.
He replies, "No I am German and how did you know my name was Walter?"
Why did the girl 👧 bring lipstick 💄 to beauty school?
Because she had a make-up exam.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
It's me. I can't get in because Stephen Hawking is blocking the door!
What is the healthiest fruit?
An orange 🍊—It takes Vitamin See!
Why did the people think Stephen Hawking was disrespectful?
'Cause he didn't stand up for the national anthem.
How do you punish Helen Keller? Just move the couch.