Short jokes
What's red, six inches long, and made my girlfriend cry when I fed it to her?
Her miscarriage.
What did the penis say to its pee?
"Urine."
What did the watch say to the failing watch company?
"You better watch it!"
How does the dog dance?
He doesn't... he's dead.
Why are all women's feet small? So they can stand closer to the stove.
My mom said to let Jesus come inside me; now I can't sit down.
What did the cannibal do after he dumped his girlfriend?
Wipe his ass.
What do you call anal rape?
Ass cream.
What do you call a girl with only one leg? Eileen.
What about an Asian girl with only one leg? Irene.
What do you call the White House when a woman becomes President? A stable.
Kenny is a comfort snacker.
Every time he's stressed, he eats his mom's pussy.
What happens when an angel and nun "have some fun and forget pills"?
The nun gets pregNUNt.
Are you in the alphabet 'cause I wanna give you the D.
If Hillary and Biden got locked in a room together, all they would talk about is how to ruin America and make a plan to steal children.
Yo mama's so fat that she used a telephone pole as a tampon.
Biden is a joke. Trump is AMAZINGLY AWESOME!
Do you know why you never mess with an orphan?
Because they’ve got guardians!
Yeah, I’m LGBTQ.
LETS GO BULLY THE QUEERS!
When the imposter is sus! 😳
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How do you get a squirrel down from a tree?
You pull down your pants and show it your nuts.