I would slap you, but that would be animal abuse.
Short Jokes
What does Helen Keller say when she touches a basketball?
Duhhuuughhhr.
I hope there is a lift to heaven. I shouldn’t be making jokes though.
What store has the most vegetables?
A nursing home.
Your clown is so stupid it took a spoon to the Super Bowl.
I complimented my neighbor's skeleton decoration for Halloween, but they just told me that it's their anorexic daughter.
A Muslim enters a building...
Along with 500 passengers and an airplane.
What's a pedophile's favorite place to go in?
Kum and Go.
My girlfriend broke up with me because of my pasta fetish.
I'm feeling cannelloni right now.
What did mama cow say to baby cow? -- "It's pasture bedtime."
What's worse than five babies stapled to one tree?
One baby stapled to five trees.
What did the pimp order at the Chinese restaurant?
He ordered some cock-bang-ho.
I like my women like I like my coffee.
Without other people's dicks in it.
I was finally released from jail a year after I beat up someone on New Year’s Eve.
Don’t blame me for being suspicious of an Arabian counting down from ten.
I saw a disabled person in the super market. They were at the vegetable aisle.
There was a blind man in WWE, and the commentator said, "Watch out! Watch... Oh, he can’t see." After he was sued for national offense.
What can a rock possibly say?
Answer: I'll fuck ya mum rock hard.
Why do you put a baby in a blender feet first?
So you can see the look on its face as you climax.
What do you call a Pakie with a wooden leg?
Shit on a stick.
You heard of Spider-Man: No Way Home. Now get ready for:
Orphan: No Way Home.
