Short jokes
Paper.
Aww c'mon! I thought my joke made the cut!
What is similar about the feelings of a girl's birth daddy and her new pimp daddy?
They both worry about how she will turn out!
Have you walked into Steven Hawking's house yet?
Yeah, neither has he.
A clown held a door open for me. I thought it was a nice jester.
Why was Stephen Hawking always bullied?
Because he couldn’t stand up for himself.
What did the bottle of conditioner do on the toilet?
Shampoo.
Little boy: Are you an orphan?
Orphan: Yes, what gave me away?
Little boy: Your parents.
My doctor told me it was perfectly normal to become aroused or even ejaculate during a prostate exam.
That being said I wish he hadn't!
Why did Sally fall off the swing?
Because someone booted her in the face. 🤣🤣
It isn't a real charity until India opens call centers, like they did with Africa.
Teacher: What does a chicken give you?
Student: An egg!
Teacher: What does a fat cow give you?
Student: Homework!
Where do astronauts 👩🚀 keep their sandwiches 🥪?
In their launch box! 🚀📦😂
Why did the orphan cross the street? Because they thought that mommy and daddy was on the other side.
What's better than 5 babies in one dumpster?
1 baby in 5 dumpsters.
How are a mouse and a bale of hay alike?
The cat'll eat it (the cattle eat it).
What was Stephen Hawking's mother's name?
Ilean.
I can't wait to see Uranus! 😂
My name is Dan, I wear white Vans, I have a gun, get in the van!
How do you enter your house?
Through Bill Gates!
Why did Michael Jackson go to the movies? He saw there was minor nudity.