Blonde chick jokes
What do you get when you cross a blonde chick and a garden tool?
A dumbass hoe.
What do a blonde chick and a field of wheat have in common?
They're both bound to get plowed at some point in time.
A man marries a blonde chick, lives a happy life together, and the man asks his wife if she wants kids. She says "yes".
So, a couple of years go by, and they have one boy and one girl. They go to school, go home with their report cards, and the dad asks what their grades were. The son says he's not doing well, same with the daughter. They ask why they're doing so bad in school, and the dad replies with "ask your mother that question!"
What do blonde chicks and Asians have in common?
They both drive with their blinker on.
Why did the blonde chick buy two Plan B pills?
She wanted to be for sure for sure!
What's the difference between a blonde chick and Alzheimer's?
None, because they both forget a lot.
Blondies.
Amanda Bynes is a lush blond who has quickly become a blond lush.
So all blondes are dumb, right?
Is that why there are so many more white people that are blonde than Black?
A blonde was down on her luck. In order to raise some money, she decided to kidnap a kid and hold him for ransom.
She went to the playground, grabbed a kid, took him behind a tree, and told him, "I've kidnapped you."
She then wrote a note saying, "I've kidnapped your kid. Tomorrow morning, put $10,000 in a paper bag and put it under the pecan tree next to the slide on the north side of the playground. Signed, Blonde."
The blonde then taped the note to the kid's shirt and sent him home to show it to his parents.
The next morning the blonde checked, and sure enough, a paper bag was sitting beneath the pecan tree. The blonde opened the bag and found the $10,000 with a note that said, "How could you do this to a fellow Blonde?"
A blonde walks in and says, "I want to buy that TV."
The seller says, "I don't sell to blondes."
The blonde comes back the next day with brown hair and says, "I want to buy that TV."
The seller says, "I don't sell to blondes."
The blonde comes back the next day with brown hair and says, "I want to buy that TV."
The seller says, "I don't sell to blondes."
The blonde asks, "That's it, how'd you know I was a blonde?"
The seller replies, "Because that's a microwave."
What do a blonde chick and a turtle both have in common?
When they're on their backs, they're screwed.