Short jokes
Your hairline is so far back my dad even took 48 hours to reach it.
My friend said he saw a blind man. I said, "Did he LOOK nice?"
Me: brags about my 30 kill streak.
The jury: O.o
Me: *gets down on one knee*
Girlfriend: OMG, it's finally happening!
Me: *falls over*
Girlfriend: The poison is kicking in.
"the floor is lava!"
- everyone, Pompeii 79 A.D.
me: I'm going to steal your heart.
her: omg that's so romantic!!
me, an organ trafficker: ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
[being buried alive]
Murderer: *out of breath* How are you eating the dirt so quickly?
Sorry, I got the joke wrong the first time.
Me running from the table where the Emo table with a happy meal.
Who was in Paris?
I dunno, the title was censored.
Why do orphans die young?
The apple doesn't fall far from the tree.
I saw you when I got chance at the adoption center!
Hi, are you even my sister?
Yes, I am.
No, you're not, because you never even existed as my sister.
Why does the retard not like eating his vegetables? Because he knows not to be a cannibal, he knows somehow.
Little Johnny has no arms. Knock, knock, who's there?
Not Johnny.
When I was born, I saw you at the adoption center alone.
That day your dad got milk. 😬😬😬😬😬😬😬😬😬😬
What does an apple have in common with an emo kid?
Answer: They both hang.
Don’t like this post, or else I will go to your house and eat you! 😈
"Suck me off, daddy, I'm doing homework."
Are you my homework because I’m supposed to be doing you right now, but I’m not.