Short jokes
What do you call a white bucket?
A pail.
My wife made electric eel for supper. I was shocked!
When the kid in the wheelchair scares you... you wheelie scared me.
What did the people in 9/11 say when they got the wrong pizza? Man, they got it wrong, I wanted this shitty plane!
Are you a gun because I want to live with you?
Me: "The villain has a point, you know."
Everyone else watching the WW2 documentary:
Mijn penis is lang lmao.
The "W" in Africa stands for water.
How dare you people make 9/11 jokes? It's just "plane" rude!
I would make a joke, but it won't be as explosive as the others.
I hate the term feminazi. It is offensive to real Nazis.
What is the difference between a feminist and a gorilla?
At least gorillas don't abort their own.
How do you stop a MeToo feminazi from telling the world about being raped? Easy: just rape her mouth shut.
Did you know Princess Diana's last dress she wore was white? But afterwards, it was red.
Halloween joke:
What do you get when you cross a vampire with a teacher?
A blood test.
What's the similarities between dark humor and cancer?
It's funnier when kids get it.
I am the danger.
There's a lot of talk about starting families, but no one ever talks about finishing what they started.
Osama's aim was horrible. One of his angry birds missed and hit a field in Pennsylvania.
What do you call an emo with curly hair?
Sam Reid.