Short jokes
A few years ago I had a brush with cancer...
All of the bristles fell out!
Wears pink.
What is an orphan's most hated baseball team? The Padres.
What is an orphan's least favorite holiday?
Christmas, they wish they'd get parents.
Q: What's 1+1? 2+2? 4+4? 8+8? Name a vegetable.
A: Carrot 🥕
It must be tiring to put makeup on two faces.
There's a disabled kid in my class, right? Oops, should've brought my Hot Wheels tracks.
I was riding a bike with no helmet. I went and went with no helmet until... I broke my head with no helmet on!
My heart broke as I went down the stairs, and my girlfriend broke her heart.
My Dad: Son, history always repeats itself.
Me: So you're gonna leave me again?
What do you call a guy with a long chin?
Chino-Chinese
Your soul is black. I have 4 guns, little kid. Get in the van before I shoot you!
Roses are red,
I am dead.
You could call me wet, or I will keep your dread.
How do Ephippians celebrate their kids' first birthday?
Put a flower on their gravestone.
Why is the ocean blue?
A: Because the fish go, "blu-blu."
I think your hairline is too stupid.
Armless guy: Even though I don’t have arms, I can do anything you normal people can do.
Me: 🎵If you’re happy and you know it, clap your hands! 🎶
Where do you bring a canoe that doesn’t feel good?... The boat dock.
What has 148 teeth and🥴🥴 holding back a monster? My zipper.
Do you want to know how the NY Jets got their name?