Short jokes
My sis told me that onions are the only food that can make you cry...
So I threw a coconut at her.
My mom told me that Africans don't have food, so I shipped my fat-ass brother.
How can you tell an Asian guy is awake?
You can never tell.
Your mummy is so tall, she uses the Eiffel Tower as a dildo.
Where do terrorists go for food? The Allah snack bar.
Call of Duty kill cam be like.
This is the best kill streak ever!
Your mama's so fat that she can’t even talk, even if Kevin says, "Oh my gosh!" 'cause she has a big ass mouth.
Why don’t cheetahs get married?
They always cheat on each other.
What is the similarity between math and buildings?
Two parallel lines can be intersected by a plane.
Q: What are cheetahs?
A: The worst card players!
I sexually identify as kilometers per second.
Cuz I really wanna km/s (kill myself).
What do you say when your pet pig gets lost?
This is a pig problem!
What jumps higher than a basketball player?
An emo kid, they never touch the ground.
What is an Iraqi kid's favorite game?
Minesweeper.
Tell who we are.
I ran over three disabled kids.
"Cripple kill."
How can a man make the world safer?
By having the chop.
If you ever thought you were gay, remember that cockroaches exist.
I had to write an essay about Africa, and I failed because I plagiarized the Hunger Games script.
I have a lot of money, but I don't waste it.
So people call me poor until they see my bank account.