Short jokes
Why don’t old people have sex?
When was the last time you tried pulling apart a grilled cheese that old?
Yo mama so disgusting, she hangs toilet paper to dry after she wiped with them.
My brother tried to hit this guy with a plane and but hit the Twin Towers.
What do you get when you die in Undertale and go to Temmie Village?
DeterMIENATION
Why couldn't the annoying dog get on Papyrus's nerves?
HE'S A SKELETON. HE DOESN'T HAVE ANY.
Why is it so punny when Sans tells a joke in the evening?
Because a SANSET is happening.
Is it incest if it’s out in the open?
Or is it... outcest?
Why did the woman cross the road?
What’s she doing out of the kitchen in the first place?
Why are gay people so bad at math? Because they can't multiply.
I was at a bar. The girl said, "Sex, sex, free sex tonight," when she really said, "663629."
Why are disabled people screwed?
Because you can't run or hide!
Want one way to get a free haircut?
Call the cancer hotline.
For my girlfriend and friends to chat :)
Recently my baby did this:
🖕🏼👶🏼🖕🏼 🎽 👖
How is sex like air? It’s not a big deal unless you aren’t getting any.
I told my fam a joke.
They all looked at me weird and one person even said, "I’m sorry!"
I was playing laser tag with my ex, but I (wink) didn't realize I had a real gun.
What do you call a premature Chinese baby birth? Wong Tai-Ming.
I thought I saw a cool sticker on my office window, then I realized it was getting bigger and bigger.
Sister, can I see your two big rabbits?