Short jokes
My life.
As a 13 year old, online dating is a tough thing.
Every time I meet someone new, they end up in jail.
What do you call a nervous Jedi?
Panakin.
Why do Native Americans hate snow?
Because it's white and settles on their land.
What do you call a short black person?
By their name, you racist!
What's the best part of dating a homeless girl?
You can drop her off anywhere.
I was asked to give a bicycle joke, but I couldn't...
I was two tired.
Dark humor is like food.
Not everyone gets it.
Did you hear about the guy who got a tattoo of an octopus?
He got inked up.
My girlfriend broke up with me because I stole her wheelchair.
But I knew she'd come crawling back to me.
What do you call a nun in a wheelchair?
Virgin mobile.
What's the hardest part about being a pedophile?
Fitting in.
A priest, a rapist, a pedophile, and a homosexual walk into a bar.
He orders a drink.
Why do pedophiles never win a race?
Because they are always coming in a little behind.
What did the pedophile say when he got out of prison?
I feel like a kid again.
Say what you want against pedophiles, but they slow down in school zones.
What do you call a Chinese billionaire?
Cha Ching.
What do you call a restaurant that sells food that contains weed?
McBongald's.
My doctor called me fat. I told him I wanted a second opinion and he said, "OK, you're ugly too."
What's even funnier than throwing a baby off a building?
Catching it with a pitchfork.