Short jokes
My girlfriend called me a pedophile... That's a big word for a 1st grader.
Poor Stephen Hawking couldn't pass the "I'm not a robot" test.
Why can you never hear bunnies having sex? Because they have cotton balls.
What was Stephen Hawking's favorite genre of music? Rock and roll.
Why did Hitler get hit by a baseball?
Because he did nazi it coming!
Why did he not love anymore? His battery died.
If Stephen Hawking had a FIFA card, he would have 99 dribbling.
Why did Stephen Hawking die?
Because his carer lost his charger.
Why was Stephen Hawking so good at FIFA? He had 99 dribble.
Stephen Hawking had pins and needles and got told to walk it off.
How did the Scottish man find the sheep in the tall grass?
Satisfying.
I love it when cancer hits like a ton of bricks. The best part is when it kills people.
What does Sonic say when he doesn't want to get caught fucking in public?
Gotta Go Fast!
9/11.
What unit of measurement is used on farms? Barn yards.
You want to hear a joke about pizza?
Sorry! Can't tell ya, it's too cheesy!
What kind of file turns a 5mm hole into a 3cm hole?
A pedo-file.
Why does a chicken cross the road?
To poop and pee in the potty!
I saw Simba walking slowly.
I told him "Mufasa!"
What’s red, blonde, and wet?
Saskia in grain.