Short jokes

Short Jokes

Baby

What's hard about walking through a bunch of dead babies?

My dick.

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  • H20

    Two men walked into a bar, and one man asked for H20, and the other man asked for H20 too.

    Only one man came out alive.

    Survivor

    What do you call a school shooting survivor who grows up to be a prostitute on the West Coast?

    A Sandy Hooker

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  • Pencil

    I own a pencil that used to be owned by William Shakespeare, but he chewed it a lot.

    Now I can't tell if it's 2B or not 2B.

    Priest

    How can you tell the difference between a Christian priest and a zit?

    One waits until you're twelve to come on your face.

    Kid

    So there was this kid being bullied by four other kids. I decided to step in.

    He didn’t stand a chance against the five of us.

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  • Baby

    What sits in the corner and gets smaller and smaller? A baby with a potato peeler.

    Santa

    Santa was asked to describe Mrs. Claus in three words. His response was, "Ho ho ho."

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  • Plan B

    Why did the blonde chick buy two Plan B pills?

    She wanted to be for sure for sure!

    Jack

    Jack and Jill went up the hill so Jack could lick her candy, but Jack had a shock and a mouth full of cock, and Jill's real name was Randy.