Short jokes
At work: Hey guys, I'm gonna Arnold clock out now.
Have you heard the latest pun about pizza?
Never mind. It’s too cheesy!
What do you call an expert fisherman?
A "MASTER-BAITER".
If Trump was an orphan, I know he would know not to build a wall because he was in one most of his life.
How do cows say "oof?"
They say, "MOOf."
In the Middle Ages it was illegal for a blind man to become a king.
I mean, I don't see why not.
I will always remember my dad's last words....
"15 dollars and I'll jump."
Why couldn’t most people remember 9/11?
Because it flew over their heads.
I have a pussy. It's very hairy. It has a long thing sticking out of it. It's also very hair. My hairy pussy meows and purrs.
That moment when you have to ask your Chinese neighbor if he's seen your cat.
I was on a plane and my mom said, "It's just a little turbulence."
And I said, "Mom, we just got on the runway!"
What's a popular name in China? Curiosity, because curiosity killed the cat.
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Give me the most likes on this site.
What do royals and hot dogs have in common?
They're usually in bread.
What do you call a 60 year old with a bomb?
Suicide Boomer.
Why don’t clams like to share?
Because they’re very shellfish.
When you start sweating after filling in "C" for the third time in a row.
Yo man, stand up.
*short person stands*
No, seriously man, stand up!
Sir William Herschel discovered Uranus in 1781, 200 years before you were born. How did he do that?