Short jokes
Why go across the street when you can just go down the hall, lol?
Did you know Princess Diana had dandruff?
Yea, they found her “head and shoulders“ on the backseat of her car.
How do you know when it’s bedtime at Michael Jackson’s house?
The big hand is on the little hand!
What's the difference between a midget and a tall person? Only one of them can ride the rides.
Down syndrome kid: Stop being greedy with the Legos! Me: Stop being greedy with the chromosomes!
"_____ abortion clinic, you rape it, we scrape it.
_____ sperm bank, you spank it, we bank it."
Why does Trump build a wall?
There’s such a thing as a ladder.
Do you know what my favorite time of day is?
6:30, hands down.
Bully... you're such an asshole. Me... Acting like a dick won't make yours any bigger.
You're so fat, Thanos had to snap three times to destroy you.
Friend, you so faaaat.
Me: Boy, at least I'm not built like a Nintendo Switch.
Friend: "You are so ugly." Me: "You can't be talking, you give Freddy Krueger nightmares."
Boi, you're the reason the Great Wall of China is a thing. You're so ugly the Chinese needed to block you out!
What do you call Stephen Hawking on fire?
Hot Wheels.
What did the officer tell the lioness after she said she was a dog?
Oooooooooh girl, you lion!
I drew a picture of Colby.
Too bad it got ripped up 😢
Why did Mrs. Henderson get a divorce from her husband, Harry?
She was tired of everyone calling the family "Hairy" and the Hendersons.
What do you call an orphan fish?
Self-ish.
Why did the poop cross the street? Because it was trying to get in the toilet.
What's the difference between a nun and a woman in a bathtub?
One's got hope in her soul, the other's got soap in her hole.