Short jokes
How do you know if a rapper is lying?
His rhymes don't add up.
Why did the rapper go to the dentist?
Because he had too many FILL-INS.
What did the DJ say to the VEGETABLE?
"Lettuce turnip the beet!"
Why was the rapper always late?
Because he had to drop his kids off at the Rhyme Bus.
What do you call a rapper who loves to cook?
A mixtape chef.
How do rappers like their pizza?
With extra rhyme-a-jalapenos.
Why did the rapper take a bath before his concert?
To get his flow SQUEAKY CLEAN!
Why was the rapper always happy?
Because he lived life on the rhyme side!
Why was the rapper always calm during performances?
Because he had a rap-titude for chillin'!
How do rappers like their coffee?
With a little bit of RAP-PUCCINO.
What did the rapper say to the microphone?
"You better DROP THE BEAT, or I'll drop YOU!"
How do rappers stay cool?
They use RAP-SICLES.
What is blonde, has six legs, and roams Michael Jackson’s dreams every night?
Hanson.
What does weed and the Carolina Panthers have in common?
They both get smoked in bowls.
A kid asks Trump:
Kid: "Where are the confidential files?"
Trump: "There they are, bud!"
Who needs dating apps when you have family reunions?
Chuck Norris doesn't breathe. He holds air hostage.
Why does an orphan hate the ending of Finding Nemo?
Nemo goes back to his father.
What do math and me on P-hub have in common?
They are both hard.
What do a male pornstar and an emo have in common?
They are both hung.